caroline holzberger

Keepin' it real about motherhood, Jesus, life, and everything in between.

My Tightrope Act

Circus people freak me out a little baffle me.

Do these people make a ton of money or something? Are they still in their rebellious phase of life? Do they each have some sort of death wish?

It’s got to be something.

What in the world would compel someone to walk on a tightrope fifty freaking feet in the air. With. No. Net. I mean, seriously?

Oh, and as if that’s not wacko-crazy-ridonkulous enough, then they ride a bicycle up there. Ya, a bicycle. On the tightrope. Then a unicycle. Then they’re blindfolded. With rings of fire. And tossed to a fellow lunatic tightroper. Upside down. With flips. Backwards.

I can’t go on. I’m getting too worked up.

Ok, well, maybe I can go on. Shocker.

But, this time I’ll talk about me and my tightrope act.

Maybe you’re familiar with it? Please say you are.

No, it may not be literally up in the air, but I sure have walked a fine line, a time or two in my life.

Dating the “bad boy”. Y’all, he was sooooo cute.

Telling my parents “No. I’m an adult now, I can decide.” Ugh. I was eighteen. Jesus, please come back before my daughter is eighteen. Please!?!

Speeding in my new car. Like, fast.

Cheating through Physics class. Don’t get me started.

Sin and Truth are often divided by what seems like a very fine line. Your conscious chooses. If you’re me between the ages of birth through now twenty, then you fell toward the sin side. Other times you dove off head first. Sigh.

But, lately, by the grace of God alone, the gift of perspective He’s given me, has kept me from that particular tightrope in some areas of my life. However, I’ve found a whole ‘notha one to balance on.

It’s the fine line between “good” and “best”. Friend, I gotta be honest, this tightrope feels like it’s about three-hundred feet higher up in the stinkin’ air.

The fine line between contentment with what we have and the desire for just a bit more.

The fine line between eating a veggie and a fruit a day and actually acting like my body is His temple and treating it as such.

The fine line between butting into a friend’s life and obeying God’s Word of admonishing our fellow believers.

The fine line between settling for the way I look/feel and joining a gym and resolving to get myself healthier.

The fine line between just serving my husband and kids and truly finding joy in my God-given role as a homemaker.

The fine line between smiling and nodding as people live as complacent Christians and shouting in their face that Jesus would throw up if He were standing here.

Ok, maybe that last one is a bit harsh.

But, sometimes I feel like I can’t get a grip.

Do you ever feel that way? Do you ever stop, take a few deep breaths, look at the world around you…and then wanna scream your flippin’ head off? If you say No, please go away.

Good! I’m not alone!

Here’s the deal…in the circus, if they take a misstep, they die. They make an instant people-pancake on the floor and traumatize the audience.

I can’t help but think that, as Christians, our missteps are equally as fatal and equally as traumatizing for the constant audience we have watching.

If we act just like the world, then why the heck would anyone be drawn to Christ? If we blend so well, why would they bother? Our attitudes. Our priorities. Our motives. Our worldliness. Our selfishness. Our judgmental hearts. Every misstep, repels one more audience member from not just the circus ring, but the Ringmaster Himself.

It’s almost too much to bear.

So, what the heck do we do!?!

I’ve got one word for you – (ok, two words)

The. Bible.


That’s it, friend.

Read the book. Do what it says. Act like the Author. Then go to bed. Wake up. Repeat.

Our beloved gift of His Holy Word is THE ONE AND ONLY way we can figure out how to get through this madness. He has Truth waiting for us in His Word. Waiting. Just sitting there in black and white and red…waiting for YOU! For ME! His Holy Spirit desires to speak to us.

To guide us.

To instruct us.

To remind us.

To convict us.

To encourage us.

To love on us.

To model for us.

To change us.

It is not an old-timey book filled with neato stories that make good flannelgraphs.

It is not a decent book to spend a few minutes reading at church on Sunday, while you count the minutes until the lunch buffet.

It is not a weapon to throw into people’s faces as you misquote the Author. How dare you.

It is the only balance we need for every tightrope we face. Whether it is between sin and Truth. Or between good and best.

His Word is alive and active. I can tell you countless times His words have jumped off the page to me, where I hadn’t seen them before. Cut me to my core. Lifted my soul. Brought me to tears.

It’s simple – just open it. Let Him do the rest.

Your circus act is not over yet. You have more to do.

Tell me, friend…do you agree?

Has He used His Truth to help you walk that fine line you faced?

Or have you felt alone on your tightrope, not knowing how to use the balancing Tool? Not sure it was worth it?

A few loving reminders :

We don’t do fake here.

We do real.

We do truth.

We do grace.

But, friend, we do obedience, too.

Will you share with me?

Love, love.

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2 thoughts on “My Tightrope Act

  1. One of my very favorite songs, too. I have a beautiful version I will send to you.

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